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04-06-2006, 02:54 PM
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#11
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Birdman
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: NYC
Posts: 376
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04-06-2006, 03:09 PM
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#12
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Mrs. Wookie~'Venger's Girl~GORE Princess~Silly Sister~Beast Lover
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: So. Oregon/Beautiful Pacific NW/Gods Country
Posts: 6,712
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daywalker
well lets see how far we can push this before posts get deleted.....
a man is laying on a nude beach when this little girl comes up to him and points down and as whats that - he embarrisngly replies...my pecker
the girl wonders why its called a pecker - he simply replies its just my lil bird and hurries her along as to avoid anymore embarissment
the man lays down and falls asleep only to be awoken later by a burning sensation and excrussiating pain
he gets up and finds his "area" is burning
after he takes care of things, he sees the little girl from earlier and asks what happned
she replied " well i came by and saw ur pecker was looking sad so i pet him hopeing to make him feel better - but the bastard spit at me so i broke his neck, crushed his eggs, and set his nest on fire"
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THIS is funny.....
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04-06-2006, 03:48 PM
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#13
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Sailor Moon
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,215
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04-06-2006, 04:05 PM
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#14
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100,000 sperm and you were the fastest?
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 1,829
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Maybe this one will do it.....
A man is walking on a beach. He sees a girl with no arms and no legs lying on
a blanket crying.
"What's the matter"
"Im sad, cause i've never been kissed." said the girl.
The guy stops to think,looks around. He dosn't see any of his friends.
Bends down and gently kisses her. And continus on his way.
On his return trip. He sees she is still crying.
"What's wrong?"
"I'm sad cause I've never been French kissed."she said.
He looks around, dosn't see anyone.
Bends down and gives her a deep long French kiss.
The guy comes back around and sees her still crying.
"Uhm,.....why are you still crying?"
"I'm sad cause I've never been felt up"she said.
He looks around. Sees people real far down the beach. Bends down, and put
his hand up her bikini top and gives her a quick peck on the cheek.
On his return trip. The girl is weeping loudly.
"Jesus. What's wrong"
"I've never been f*cked." she said between the tears.
"He looks around. The beach is cleared. He bends down.
Picks her up. Throws her in the ocean.
"Now your f*cked!"
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04-06-2006, 04:42 PM
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#15
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The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Long Island
Posts: 1,457
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how do u make a dead baby float ?
put it in root beer
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04-06-2006, 04:46 PM
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#16
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Minister of GORE/ROT Mod Relations
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hey, aren't you that guy that used to be funny?
Posts: 5
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"Mrs. Smith, Mrs. Smith...can Tommy come out and play baseball?"
"But Jimmy, you know Tommy has no arms and legs."
"I know, we wanna use him for third base."
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04-06-2006, 04:48 PM
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#17
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Minister of GORE/ROT Mod Relations
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hey, aren't you that guy that used to be funny?
Posts: 5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daywalker
how do u make a dead baby float ?
put it in root beer
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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road?
A: It was stapled to the chicken.
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04-06-2006, 04:57 PM
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#18
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Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: England
Posts: 7,058
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A woman goes to her doctor complaining her husband hasn't made love to her in years. The doctor says "Why don't you try Viagra?". The woman replies that her husband doesn't take any tablets. The doctor suggests she grinds up the pill and slips it into a drink. The woman says OK.
She comes back next week and the doctor asks what happened. "Oh doctor it was awful. I slipped a viagra into his drink when we were having a meal. He immediatly jumped over the table, ripped my clothes off and made mad passionate love to me. It was the best sex I'd had in years". Puzzled, the doctor asks "Well what was the problem?" The woman replies "I'll never be able to show my face at that resteraunt again ...."
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04-06-2006, 06:49 PM
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#19
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Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 800
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Thats a good one.
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04-06-2006, 08:31 PM
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#20
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What's another word for Thesaurus?
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,308
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Collection King 13
One day a first grade teacher had a taste test with her students.
She picked a little boy to do the first test. She blindfolded him, put a Hershey kiss in his mouth and asked, "Do you know what it is?"
"No, I don't," said the little boy.
"Okay, I'll give you a clue. It's the thing your daddy wants from your mommy before he goes to work."
Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled,
"Spit it out!
It's a piece of ASS*!"
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