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01-23-2009, 01:11 PM
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#91
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Minister of GORE/ROT Mod Relations
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hey, aren't you that guy that used to be funny?
Posts: 5
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A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.
The painting depicted three very black and totally naked men sitting on a park bench.
Two of the figures had black weenies, but the one in the middle had a pink weenie.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment.
He went on for nearly half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African-Americans in a predominately white, patriarchal society.
'In fact,' he pointed out, 'some serious critics believe that the pink weenie also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society.'
After the curator left, a young man in a Kentucky T-shirt approached the couple and said, 'Would you like to know what the painting is really about?'
'Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of
the gallery?' asked the couple.
'Because I'm the guy who painted it,' he replied. 'In fact, there are no African-Americans depicted at all. They're just three Kentucky coal miners, and the guy in the middle went home for lunch.'
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01-23-2009, 01:58 PM
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#92
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Cobra Command
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,900
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pablocruze
A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.
The painting depicted three very black and totally naked men sitting on a park bench.
Two of the figures had black weenies, but the one in the middle had a pink weenie.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment.
He went on for nearly half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African-Americans in a predominately white, patriarchal society.
'In fact,' he pointed out, 'some serious critics believe that the pink weenie also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society.'
After the curator left, a young man in a Kentucky T-shirt approached the couple and said, 'Would you like to know what the painting is really about?'
'Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of
the gallery?' asked the couple.
'Because I'm the guy who painted it,' he replied. 'In fact, there are no African-Americans depicted at all. They're just three Kentucky coal miners, and the guy in the middle went home for lunch.'
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01-23-2009, 02:09 PM
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#93
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Kindly Asked To Leave
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: West Coast
Posts: 24,710
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I laughed out loud at this..
Quote:
Originally Posted by pablocruze
A couple attending an art exhibition at the National Gallery were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.
The painting depicted three very black and totally naked men sitting on a park bench.
Two of the figures had black weenies, but the one in the middle had a pink weenie.
The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble interpreting the painting and offered his assessment.
He went on for nearly half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of African-Americans in a predominately white, patriarchal society.
'In fact,' he pointed out, 'some serious critics believe that the pink weenie also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society.'
After the curator left, a young man in a Kentucky T-shirt approached the couple and said, 'Would you like to know what the painting is really about?'
'Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of
the gallery?' asked the couple.
'Because I'm the guy who painted it,' he replied. 'In fact, there are no African-Americans depicted at all. They're just three Kentucky coal miners, and the guy in the middle went home for lunch.'
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01-31-2009, 06:08 PM
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#94
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Minister of GORE/ROT Mod Relations
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hey, aren't you that guy that used to be funny?
Posts: 5
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SUPER BOWL
A man had 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. As he sat down, he
noticed that the seat next to him was empty. He asked the man on the
other side of the empty seat whether anyone was sitting there.
"No," the man replied, "The seat is empty."
"This is incredible," said the first man. "Who in their right mind
would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting
event in the world, and not use it?"
The second man replied, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was
supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This will be the
first Super bowl we haven't been to together since we got married in
1967."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But could n't you find
someone else -- a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the
seat?"
The man shook his head. "No, they're all at the funeral."
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01-31-2009, 06:12 PM
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#95
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Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: TERROR DOME
Posts: 7,537
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pablocruze
A man had 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. As he sat down, he
noticed that the seat next to him was empty. He asked the man on the
other side of the empty seat whether anyone was sitting there.
"No," the man replied, "The seat is empty."
"This is incredible," said the first man. "Who in their right mind
would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting
event in the world, and not use it?"
The second man replied, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was
supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This will be the
first Super bowl we haven't been to together since we got married in
1967."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But could n't you find
someone else -- a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the
seat?"
The man shook his head. "No, they're all at the funeral."
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02-04-2009, 10:47 AM
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#96
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curmudgeon Mod
Super Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: The Shire
Posts: 35,059
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Husband down
HUSBAND DOWN
A Husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up
a Case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them, demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'
Heard on the PA system:
'Cleanup needed on aisle 25, we have a husband down.
__________________
The damn things invisible!
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02-04-2009, 11:48 AM
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#97
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anywhere I lay my head I'm gonna call my home
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Portland, Or
Posts: 14,421
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02-04-2009, 11:55 AM
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#98
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Cobra Command
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,900
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nbr3bagshotrow
HUSBAND DOWN
A Husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up
a Case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them, demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'
Heard on the PA system:
'Cleanup needed on aisle 25, we have a husband down.
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I sent this to Evil-Lyn.
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02-04-2009, 01:10 PM
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#99
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The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney...
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Over the hills and far away..
Posts: 3,434
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thats good, LOL
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02-06-2009, 12:09 AM
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#100
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Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: TERROR DOME
Posts: 7,537
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good one nbr3bagshotrow
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