a man's point of view....

[endsongjen]

ok i know u guys probably dont care but id like to know how ur reactions/advice, etc.

im getting married soon and ive decided to have my grandfather walk me down the aisle. he raised both my sister and i since i was 7 and she was 2. my fathers always been in the picture but we werent really that close for other reasons id rather not get in to. he recently started showing up again and we have a so so relationship, havent heard from him in a few months now come to think of it. soooo my question is, if u were my father would u be upset that i chose my grandfather to walk me down the aisle? should i be scared of how my dad will react? (he's kinda crazy) how do i tell him? should i just let them both do it? and am i crazy for even asking???

[Teague]

Originally Posted by endsongjen

ok i know u guys probably dont care but id like to know how ur reactions/advice, etc.

im getting married soon and ive decided to have my grandfather walk me down the aisle. he raised both my sister and i since i was 7 and she was 2. my fathers always been in the picture but we werent really that close for other reasons id rather not get in to. he recently started showing up again and we have a so so relationship, havent heard from him in a few months now come to think of it. soooo my question is, if u were my father would u be upset that i chose my grandfather to walk me down the aisle? should i be scared of how my dad will react? (he's kinda crazy) how do i tell him? should i just let them both do it? and am i crazy for even asking???

First, Jen, congratulations on the engagement. Hope your wedding is wonderful!

Personally, I'd suggest having your grandfather walk you down the aisle, especially if your father isn't all there. You could offer to throw your dad a bone and ask him to be an usher, if you'd like. If your Dad really balks at this, you could always have both your grandfather and dad walk you down the aisle!

Ultimately, though, do what's going to help you have the best day possible, and create the best memories.

[Alex655321]

Gongrats Jen
I think you are making the right decision

[riderV3]

First of all, congrat, young lady!!

Hell just left your daddy outta this whole thing.
If he's not a part of your life, why cares, yeah I know he's your father blah blah blah but he's not a responsible one.

Been raised by my mom alone, my dad rarely participated any big events in our life so he's more of redundant in my life. And he's just like your father, he shown up recently and trying to meddle between our things but I don't give him a crap.

I say your father would be upset but he shouldn't blame you for it since he's the one who left you all behind for whatever reason.

Let your grandpa have this honor, he deserves it.

[endsongjen]

thanks guys. i guess its just the actual confrontation im afraid of. and the fact that he'll say my mother wasnt there either (neithr of them were) but she's participating. though she would understand.

[endsongjen]

Originally Posted by riderV3

First of all, congrat, young lady!!

Hell just left your daddy outta this whole thing.
If he's not a part of your life, why cares, yeah I know he's your father blah blah blah but he's not a responsible one.

Been raised by my mom alone, my dad rarely participated any big events in our life so he's more of redundant in my life. And he's just like your father, he shown up recently and trying to meddle between our things but I don't give him a crap.

I say your father would be upset but he shouldn't blame you for it since he's the one who left you all behind for whatever reason.

Let your grandpa have this honor, he deserves it.

this is how i was. it was just weird, i wasnt comfortable around him and id be all tense, couldnt tell when he was joking or being serious. my fiancee was trippin on the whole experience

[riderV3]

Originally Posted by endsongjen

this is how i was. it was just weird, i wasnt comfortable around him and id be all tense, couldnt tell when he was joking or being serious. my fiancee was trippin on the whole experience

I know, my mom said she's not going to accept him even he's trying to move back with her, and he better not try to move in with either of us kids, or I'll make him sleep in the bathroom with toilet bowl.
I'm a son but you're a daughter, this nonexistent father relationship will put you in a more awkward position than I do...
So best wishes, young lady, you got my prayer, hope everything goes well on the day of day!

[cblakey1]

Congrats Jen!

Have your grandad do it by all means. He's the one that's practically raised you so he should do it. If your dad doesn't understand, tough s#it. Just ask yourself has he been with you every step of the way in the engagement/wedding planning and is he financing the wedding? That should be the determining factor. Plus I think it would hurt your grandad more to drop him for pop!

I think your dad should understand regardless of how crazy he is.

When I got married my wife's stepdad walked her down the aisle while the biological father was a guest. He knew he wasn't there for my wife throughout the years and he was good with his role. It would be selfish for your dad to expect that all of a sudden he can show up and be a part of the event. Wedding plans are usually set in stone long before the wedding and they can't be changed on a whim.

JMO FWIW.

[endsongjen]

well for sure my grandpa will be doing it. thats if i dont shoot myself with all the planning. im kinda not wanting to do the whole big wedding thing now.

[Ink]

Originally Posted by endsongjen

well for sure my grandpa will be doing it. thats if i dont shoot myself with all the planning. im kinda not wanting to do the whole big wedding thing now.

go to vegas or tennessee